You mentioned the course you had in which the two sexes had to reverse their gender roles and how most of the males were reluctant. I think that really illustrates the differences of society’s expectations. It’s okay for a woman to hold hands with another woman, but not for men to hold hands with other men. It’s okay for a woman to “act like a boy” (she is just a “tomboy”), but society tries to say it’s wrong for a man to act like a woman. That exercise would actually be really interesting.

You brought up some great points about the differences in the way society treats males and females. Thanks for your very insightful perspective and detailed post!

One of my psychology courses was “Gender Roles,” and one assignment was to do exactly what you suggest. At the beginning of the class, we were given a project, separated into workgroups, and instructed to behave as the other sex/gender for the remainder of the class. As expected, most of the guys were reluctant to do so, but the girls had fun with it. I think the participants would have to be into it in order to actually learn something from it, and it’s hard to get most guys to let their guards down enough to express their concepts of femininity. Women, on the other hand, usually don’t have any such psychological barriers in that area.

Anyway, the various changes you list regarding the swapping of sex/gender roles, while comical, are pretty accurate. As a transsexual, I’ve experienced both sides of the physical expectations, dating customs, interests, and emotional expressions that you brought up. Several differences you note, especially in the areas of dating and interests, are dead-on.

For example, even though I never was very big or masculine as a man, no one ever worried about me walking alone through a parking lot when I went out in public as a guy. I was on my own, and others expected to handle whatever came my way. As a woman, my male friends (and even some female friends) routinely offer to walk me to my car when I leave a bar, coffee house, party, etc., especially at night. Internally, I still feel the same, and I wish they had offered to do things like that when I was presenting myself as a guy, but externally, the perception others have of me is entirely different. Those different perceptions cause others to interact with me much differently. And yes, dating is completely different!

I don’t want to say that others are nicer to me as a woman, but they certainly are more concerned about me. They open doors for me, ask me if I’m O.K. or if I need anything, offer to help me carry things, and men don’t ask me to help them move or carry anything. There are many more examples, but I’m already running long. In short, I can personally verify your statements about the differences in the way the two genders are perceived and treated in our society.

Again, great blog entry!